4 May 2013
Nothing
Buen Camino
We left our frigid albergue this morning for what proved to be a long, steady climb up. It turned out to be not a difficult as we imagined. It was a climb, but through breathtaking fields of more rolling hills of barley and terraces on some hillsides for crops. The sky today was a deep, deep blue that made everything even more beautiful. Little opportunity for distraction.
The evening meal before this walk I ate with my second and third encounter of those who have embraced St Francis spirituality. The first gal was a 36 year old from Denmark. Her name was Lanea. The two at table last night made this kind of life style almost alarming, for I never hear of such things much. One was a 28ish yr old gal from Liverpool. She has given everything she owns to live in a covenant community where she works for the community. Everything she has is shared by her community. The third ecounter was a couple from North Carolina. Each of the three has sold all their belongings, committed to a life of simplicity and service. The couple are part of an Episcopal church, but are now 3rd order Franciscans. They sold their home, gave their possessions to their adult children, and now travel and live in their motor home moving from one service project after another. Their names are Mike and Jenny. Mike is retired military and his focus is on helping vets. Jenny is dedicated to helping the deaf. Both are deeply spiritual and speak so fondly of the spiritual life of simplicity. Beautiful people.
Now I have3 encounters with pilgrims who have given it all up to embrace their faith without their arms filled with "stuff"
This dimension of spiritual life has been the engine for my prayer time today. It was around the idea of "nothing." It was quite a challenging meditation. Jesus told the rich man to sell all his things, give to the poor, and then follow him. Other Jesus encounters in the scriptures reference giving up one's life in order to find it. I could go on and on. The opportunity is to surrender all in order to have His all.
That would leave one with, well, "nothing." That was the perturbing single focus of my meditation. What I would have to surrender of 'things' I really enjoy? Of course, they're selfish pleasures. I love our home. My fun little car. My flower garden. Do I dare admit- ice cream treats. Yep. These are among 'things' I really enjoy. I was clear that nothing meant things, not people. Nothing means 'no things.'
After hours of looking at the dirty truth about my attachments to certain things, I was overwhelmed by the first line in 23rd Psalm. "The Lord is my Shepherd, there is "nothing" I shall want. There it is. Having Jesus is all I need. The surrender of the 'things' in my life is a process, and the calling for less of it makes room for more of Jesus. I had to come to grips that is someways, my LDL's of things in my affecting my spiritual life. A good time to consider my spiritual cholestrol figures. It's a process I need to examine.
As the meditation continued, I was drawn to the end of that Psalm, " and I will dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life. I remembered from an earlier study regarding this verse that the word, 'dwell' in the Hebrew really is an inadequate word for really three different words/concepts.
Be aware
Be present
Dwell
To me, to be aware is to respect those in faith before me. This can include champions of the faith, the saints, the family of my past who have be strong believers and baton passers of who Jesus is. So many loving people of my childhood taught me as a boy about the church, how to pray, and were examples of His love and mercy.
To me, to be present is to be, well-'present.' This includes sensitizing myself for the Jesus around me. Slowing down, listening- I mean really listening-this brings so much of a presence of Him. Call it a God hunt, God moment, a movement of the Spirit, He is all around us. I just need to shut off all the blabber and noise around me and be 'present.' The camino is a silent, solitary, deeply reflective experience. Jesus is present in these quiet niches. Unlucky for Him, I chatter all day in His ears. At times I can almost hear Him say, " OK, all ready. I know you love me. And I love you."
To me, to 'dwell' is to, in a way, to genuflect before His greatness. Good things, good fortune has occurred in my life. When I consider the treasure my sweet wife is to me, my precious children, and now my grandchildren, I am overwhelmed by the truth that not all can claim these gifts. Life could have gone another way for me. So many different circumstances could have occurred. By the grace of God, I am deeply grateful. In that thankfulness I can 'dwell.'
So true for all of us, friends. Starting a diet of 'things', making more room for Jesus within our heart, and moving from many 'things' to some 'things' to 'No things' is a spiritual journey of simplicity.
The song that rattled along in my head all day said it all. It is sung by Lori True and David Haas.
"You are all I want.
You are all I need.
You are my one desire.
You shepherd me with love
And lead me through the darkness to light
To you, my hands are raised."
Upcoming:
A 250m climb in a 5km distance with a 350m descent. Known for being really dangerous, according guide book.
Prayers would be so appreciated.
Carinosamente,
Deacon Willie
Saturday, May 4, 2013
Friday, May 3, 2013
3 May 2013
Villamayor del Rio, just east of Belorado
Imprinted
Buen Camino,
Today we started off with the absence of rain. This was welcome and rare for our journey thus far. We had stayed at a B&B with a wonderful home. First time I've slept on a real bed, had our own bathroom, and used real towels. It was luxurious.
The 25k today was through some beautiful, rolling countryside. There were far reaches of barley fields that were so gorgeous green. The fields that surrounded us made me think of pictures of Ireland. They were bursting with green on undulating hills.
This part of the camino stretched thru the Meseta. Even though much of the trail ran alongside busy highway, the stunning green hills outshouted the noise. I was consumed in God's beauty.
It led me to a contemplation of all the fingerprints on my life of those who love me. So many have come and gone in my life who have touched me and made me rich in family and friendship. Their prints not only are memorable, but have formed me. This day of reflection allowed me to pause and genuflect with the memory of so many and to consider their story/their struggles/their joys.
Not only their fingerprints, but their palm prints as well. I spent time recalling how blessed it was to have the pilgrim's blessing at our church a week before I left. It is customary to raise one's hand, palm forward, toward the one being blessed. During the mass, my family came forward with my pack and boots, put their hands on me, and shared with the congregation the blessing Father Rich prayed over me.
Today in particular I recalled my little grandson, Brady, scratching at my shoulder to grab his Papa. Oh, how I relish the feel and memory! Behind me were the outstretched palms of so many praying for me.
Today, I'm reminded of how the fingerprints, the palm prints, the prayer prints have empowered this camino walk. Names and faces of so many flip like a powerpoint slide show in my mind. As I see each face, I recall their goodness, their prayer requests, and their needs.
How much pleasure it has given to have these extended prayer times for you all. How much love I feel for your life. How much this love has indeed,' imprinted' me.
We're all collages of love prints, aren't we? Take a pause to capture that imaginary artwork. I have. A canvass of all of our love imprinted on one masterpiece to be enjoyed.
Above all this, what was most penetrating to me today was a line in Isaiah that says, "Even if a mother should forget her child, I will never forget you." Now the best part, "I have carved you on the palms of my hands."
How humbling. How privileged. To have my image on the hands of God. To be "imprinted."
That is a gift beyond imagination: being on His love collage along with all 'imprinted' . What an artwork of prints and imprints!
If you can really picture it, look for mine. They will be the ones with ice cream stains on it.
Upcoming:
Villafranca, a 300m climb in 17k
steep ups and drastic descents
Prayers deeply appreciated
Carinosamente,
Deacon Willie
Villamayor del Rio, just east of Belorado
Imprinted
Buen Camino,
Today we started off with the absence of rain. This was welcome and rare for our journey thus far. We had stayed at a B&B with a wonderful home. First time I've slept on a real bed, had our own bathroom, and used real towels. It was luxurious.
The 25k today was through some beautiful, rolling countryside. There were far reaches of barley fields that were so gorgeous green. The fields that surrounded us made me think of pictures of Ireland. They were bursting with green on undulating hills.
This part of the camino stretched thru the Meseta. Even though much of the trail ran alongside busy highway, the stunning green hills outshouted the noise. I was consumed in God's beauty.
It led me to a contemplation of all the fingerprints on my life of those who love me. So many have come and gone in my life who have touched me and made me rich in family and friendship. Their prints not only are memorable, but have formed me. This day of reflection allowed me to pause and genuflect with the memory of so many and to consider their story/their struggles/their joys.
Not only their fingerprints, but their palm prints as well. I spent time recalling how blessed it was to have the pilgrim's blessing at our church a week before I left. It is customary to raise one's hand, palm forward, toward the one being blessed. During the mass, my family came forward with my pack and boots, put their hands on me, and shared with the congregation the blessing Father Rich prayed over me.
Today in particular I recalled my little grandson, Brady, scratching at my shoulder to grab his Papa. Oh, how I relish the feel and memory! Behind me were the outstretched palms of so many praying for me.
Today, I'm reminded of how the fingerprints, the palm prints, the prayer prints have empowered this camino walk. Names and faces of so many flip like a powerpoint slide show in my mind. As I see each face, I recall their goodness, their prayer requests, and their needs.
How much pleasure it has given to have these extended prayer times for you all. How much love I feel for your life. How much this love has indeed,' imprinted' me.
We're all collages of love prints, aren't we? Take a pause to capture that imaginary artwork. I have. A canvass of all of our love imprinted on one masterpiece to be enjoyed.
Above all this, what was most penetrating to me today was a line in Isaiah that says, "Even if a mother should forget her child, I will never forget you." Now the best part, "I have carved you on the palms of my hands."
How humbling. How privileged. To have my image on the hands of God. To be "imprinted."
That is a gift beyond imagination: being on His love collage along with all 'imprinted' . What an artwork of prints and imprints!
If you can really picture it, look for mine. They will be the ones with ice cream stains on it.
Upcoming:
Villafranca, a 300m climb in 17k
steep ups and drastic descents
Prayers deeply appreciated
Carinosamente,
Deacon Willie
Thursday, May 2, 2013
2 May 2013
Cruciero, east of Santo Domingo
My Encircler
Buen Camino
Today we awoke to another morning of cold rain for our journey toward Santo Domingo. We're beyond regret or fret over the weather. As the S Africans say, "Just push on."
Each morning we begin our day in prayer together. I guess I should say, "Bishop Eric," has composed a hybrid prayer from many sources, one of which is of his new passion, that of the Celts. One line in it has been wonderfully perturbing for me. "Jesus, my encircler." I heard it each morning now and have begun to anticipate it.
Today we walked through breathtakingly beautiful terrain from Vajera. It was a trail of rolling ups and downs, not bad, fields of barley and countless grape vineyards. Right along the path are prolific tall grasses mixed with that gorgeous oil seed rape, a shrub about 2' covered with lemon yellow flowers and fire-engine red poppies crowding in along side blue lavendar plants and some early baby white daiseys. . Scores of them. So beautiful. Yes, I can get in touch with my feminine side with flowers and garden plants. Beyond the immediate trail is once again the vineyards and barley fields that stretch to the foothills of terraced fields prepared for planting, but not in b loom. Beyond that some 20k out are snow capped mountain ranges.
As I walked along, I recognized that I was completely surrounded by these mts. To my left were the most majestic, in front of me- more mts, to my right- high foothills and then the escarpement of the coastal range with more mts beyond them. I was surrounded by mt ranges. Mts are overwhelming creations especially with the sheer size, snow presence, and the heavy clouds straining to lift themselves over the peaks. Breath-taking.
As I prayed my way through this majesty, it became more and more penetrating that I was walking through inter mountain valley. Yes, I was encirced.
It was the fruit of some wonder-filled prayer considering the sheer strength and power these mts held. They became for me the powerful arms of God "encircling" me. Their strength was easily imagined as the most powerful arms of God. Their sheer strength absorbed the harsh storms that strained to slip into the valley. I was experiencing God as a circle of power, strength, enormity of Father's loving care, and eternal.
In short, what I saw was what I was experiencing as a new relation with God-as my 'encircler. " That is, deep into the powerful arms of God's embrace. It was a 25k walk of a giant bear hug from God. Oh how I felt like a little boy in his Daddy's big, strong arms. I slipped along in all that green beauty with my Creator encircing me.
Each step was a gush of wiggling and comfort in His arms. I looked for His face, felt His loving glance, and He so intently relished in my attention of Him.
Sometime later in the walk with the encircling connection going on in my prayer time, it occurred to me that the mts did protect me/us from harsh storms, but not in all events in my life. I thought of painful, hurtful storms that have galed me away. Things like my dad dying at the young age of 64, my brother dying of a drug overdose, hearing my saintly mother's week-long moan in pain at deaths door, and intensely most painful- the surprise heart attack and death of our oldest son. Storms like these God allowed to slip over the mt peaks.
I will never know the mind of God or His ultimate purposes, but I was penetrated with the knowledge that His arms are forever encircling. His massively strong arms represented by these mts are ever-present. Situations change. Relationships change. I/You change. God never changes. He is forever encircling. Good things happen. Bad luck and hurt occurs..
I drifted from that truth toward contemplating how I can experience the encircling power of God's mighty arms while I busy with too much of "my" life. Afterall, why would I ever not crave a big bear hug from God?To feel His mightly arms of security and love.?To be that little kid in a loving Daddy's strong arms? I need to feel it. Not just imagine it.
Start by hugging yourself. I know. Weird. Just before sleep, wrap your arms around yourself and give YOU a big, strong, sustained hug. Feel the embrace and think of God.After a while, you'll forget they are your own arms. Just picture Him and remind yourself of how crazy in love with YOU that He is.
Hug others more deliberately. It's only an occasional, very rare church hug here. Someone in your life will be more appropriate to hug deeply, more as a message of how you love them to the core. I can say that I most dearly miss the embrace of my sweet wife. I miss being able to hug my little girl as a Daddy who is crazy proud of her and loves her- just as she is. Also, to hug my boys, my dear church friends, faith brothers. I miss my encircling families.
A hug, done purposely, has love language within it. I've come to recognize a hug such as this as an imitation of Christ as an encircler.
His power is all around you and me already-
let's get our strong arms around someone else.
Upcoming:
Villa de mayor-25k
a moderate walk
Next day: 1100 k climb-God help me
Carinosamente,
Deacon Willie
Cruciero, east of Santo Domingo
My Encircler
Buen Camino
Today we awoke to another morning of cold rain for our journey toward Santo Domingo. We're beyond regret or fret over the weather. As the S Africans say, "Just push on."
Each morning we begin our day in prayer together. I guess I should say, "Bishop Eric," has composed a hybrid prayer from many sources, one of which is of his new passion, that of the Celts. One line in it has been wonderfully perturbing for me. "Jesus, my encircler." I heard it each morning now and have begun to anticipate it.
Today we walked through breathtakingly beautiful terrain from Vajera. It was a trail of rolling ups and downs, not bad, fields of barley and countless grape vineyards. Right along the path are prolific tall grasses mixed with that gorgeous oil seed rape, a shrub about 2' covered with lemon yellow flowers and fire-engine red poppies crowding in along side blue lavendar plants and some early baby white daiseys. . Scores of them. So beautiful. Yes, I can get in touch with my feminine side with flowers and garden plants. Beyond the immediate trail is once again the vineyards and barley fields that stretch to the foothills of terraced fields prepared for planting, but not in b loom. Beyond that some 20k out are snow capped mountain ranges.
As I walked along, I recognized that I was completely surrounded by these mts. To my left were the most majestic, in front of me- more mts, to my right- high foothills and then the escarpement of the coastal range with more mts beyond them. I was surrounded by mt ranges. Mts are overwhelming creations especially with the sheer size, snow presence, and the heavy clouds straining to lift themselves over the peaks. Breath-taking.
As I prayed my way through this majesty, it became more and more penetrating that I was walking through inter mountain valley. Yes, I was encirced.
It was the fruit of some wonder-filled prayer considering the sheer strength and power these mts held. They became for me the powerful arms of God "encircling" me. Their strength was easily imagined as the most powerful arms of God. Their sheer strength absorbed the harsh storms that strained to slip into the valley. I was experiencing God as a circle of power, strength, enormity of Father's loving care, and eternal.
In short, what I saw was what I was experiencing as a new relation with God-as my 'encircler. " That is, deep into the powerful arms of God's embrace. It was a 25k walk of a giant bear hug from God. Oh how I felt like a little boy in his Daddy's big, strong arms. I slipped along in all that green beauty with my Creator encircing me.
Each step was a gush of wiggling and comfort in His arms. I looked for His face, felt His loving glance, and He so intently relished in my attention of Him.
Sometime later in the walk with the encircling connection going on in my prayer time, it occurred to me that the mts did protect me/us from harsh storms, but not in all events in my life. I thought of painful, hurtful storms that have galed me away. Things like my dad dying at the young age of 64, my brother dying of a drug overdose, hearing my saintly mother's week-long moan in pain at deaths door, and intensely most painful- the surprise heart attack and death of our oldest son. Storms like these God allowed to slip over the mt peaks.
I will never know the mind of God or His ultimate purposes, but I was penetrated with the knowledge that His arms are forever encircling. His massively strong arms represented by these mts are ever-present. Situations change. Relationships change. I/You change. God never changes. He is forever encircling. Good things happen. Bad luck and hurt occurs..
I drifted from that truth toward contemplating how I can experience the encircling power of God's mighty arms while I busy with too much of "my" life. Afterall, why would I ever not crave a big bear hug from God?To feel His mightly arms of security and love.?To be that little kid in a loving Daddy's strong arms? I need to feel it. Not just imagine it.
Start by hugging yourself. I know. Weird. Just before sleep, wrap your arms around yourself and give YOU a big, strong, sustained hug. Feel the embrace and think of God.After a while, you'll forget they are your own arms. Just picture Him and remind yourself of how crazy in love with YOU that He is.
Hug others more deliberately. It's only an occasional, very rare church hug here. Someone in your life will be more appropriate to hug deeply, more as a message of how you love them to the core. I can say that I most dearly miss the embrace of my sweet wife. I miss being able to hug my little girl as a Daddy who is crazy proud of her and loves her- just as she is. Also, to hug my boys, my dear church friends, faith brothers. I miss my encircling families.
A hug, done purposely, has love language within it. I've come to recognize a hug such as this as an imitation of Christ as an encircler.
His power is all around you and me already-
let's get our strong arms around someone else.
Upcoming:
Villa de mayor-25k
a moderate walk
Next day: 1100 k climb-God help me
Carinosamente,
Deacon Willie
Wednesday, May 1, 2013
1 May 2013
Buen Camino
Temperance
Ventosa, just east of Najera
After yesterday's walk in cold rain, sleet and stiff headwind, we finally arrived in Logorno. It was a longer walk and we arrived at the albergue (Al berg) to find that we were competing for one of the last 7 beds. It meant standing in line for an additional hour with aching feet and heavy paks. The place was PACKED with pilgrims. We were sandwiched in a room of 28 to share 2 shower stalls and two toilets with 56.
That many people stuffed in for sleep was intense. We were all drowned rats and desperate for sleep. There was so precious little space between bunks and climbing room to a top bunk. Yea, old guy in the top bunk that nite.
With that many in close quarters, the odds played out. One guy with a deep snore with a variety of rhythms and volumes. That fact and my being overstimulated by all that God keeps rolling thru my mind, I didn't sleep but about 1-2 hours.
It was topic of robust conversation and jokes by the other 27 first thing in the morning. That's when I was reminded of some wise advice from my dear friend, Deacon Marty Hetzel, from SJN church. We would meet to pray the Office and share ministry insights. When the opportunity for "piling on" when something is easy to complain about, he shared that it is better to avoid the thought all together. Don't let it in your thinking. Keep pushing it out. Yes, don't allow it to entertain or keep playing like a bump on a cd song.
Exercise temperance. That is, be stronger self disciplined or what we'd call resisting temptation.
The snorer and all the drain it put on this new day without sleep could have stolen my joy. It could have replayed over and over again for what it cost me to be more physically diminished for the new day. It could have released me to take a wiffle ball bat to this guy. (Not sure that I could have stopped the other 27.)
I had the choice. Today I chose temperance and what a difference it has made in this day of gently rolling trails with a such a pleasant prayer-filled day.
How easy it is to join in when injustice or sacrifice is involved. How easy it is to shout out or dwell on it and whine with other sufferers.
A wonderful friend onced told me, " Why do you let him/her take up so much room in your head? They're not even paying rent."
More love, more strength, more PEACE, was won for me today by the exercise of "temperance."
Today is May 1 and I spent the day singing this song:
"Hail Holy Queen enthroned above
Oh, Ma ri a
Triumph all you cheribim
Sing with all the seraphim
Salve, salve, salve regina."
I feel your prayers. Really. Each step is blessed. All 186km of them so far.
Carinosamente,
Deacon Willie
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