Siloam

24 October 2015
Fatima

Siloam

My final post. What a spiritual banquet I´'ve had!  Today is my final day in Fatima.  This is the place the Blessed Mother visited 99 years ago to three small children.  The story of the visitation is fascinating in that so many miracles have occurred here.  People of all nations gather at the chapel where the visitation occurred. They pray, sing Marian songs, pray the rosary, and mass after mass is said in different languages. Being immersed in prayer with people who are fervent in faith is so inspiring.

Perhaps because these are my final days, my attention has been drawn to a story from John 9, to story of Jesus' healing of the blind man.  It is a familar story of the man, born blind, who was begging at the temple. Jesus makes clay from his spittle and dirt and annoints the man's eyes. Then he says, "Go and wash in the pool of Siloam." This is what caught my attention in my contemplations. John points out that the word, "Siloam" means "sent."

Jesus was 'sent' into the world. He then "sent" this man to wash. The rest of the gospel unfolds this man's step by step conversion of deeper and deeper faith. 

I've heard it said that the stories in the bible have a cycle that repeats over and over again. First, God calls and gathers us, He loves us, then sends us out."  I've reflected prayerfully upon this cycle within the gospels these past few days. Little Zachaeus who climbed the sycamore tree, the woman caught in adultery, the Samaritan woman at the well, and many others play well into this cycle.  God called them to himself, He loved them, then sent them out.

It strikes me that this is the cycle in which my pilgrimage has journeyed.  Without a shadow of doubt, I have been called to walk the Camino and to begin and end my prayerful journey in the shrines where our Blessed Mother appeared.  I have experienced a love beyond measure each step of the way.  And now, I believe I am being "sent" for a new mission.  So many opportunities and challenges lie ahead. Some are intimidating, some adventuresome, some are daunting.  What I know in the depth of my heart is the call to just "Have Faith."

Let me share a story of a holy encounter that I experienced while here in Fatima. I was approached by a 90 plus year old Domincan nun, Sr. Mary of the Angels of Fatima at this Dominican retreat house where I'm staying.  She has served here in Fatima alone for 50 years. During our conversation I was asked of my family. Sr. Mary is one of these who listens with her whole being. She delighted with each story of child and grandchild. I asked of her family and her background. She shared a bit then started to choke up and cry. "I have no one," she shared. It occurred to me that her name itself speaks of who she is, Mary of the angels. I reminded her of this and her grief faded into a soft, gentle smile. Peace now glowed in her face framed in her Dominican habit and veil.  Rembrandt could not have captured the love and humility that radiated from her. I stood in the presence of someone truly holy.

Sr. Mary lived the cycle of being called, loved, and sent.  She surrendered family and comfort of a child's love that motherhood could have offered her. She lives in poverty and service to the mission of the church.  Her life of sacrifice of being called and sent has been rewarded by a radiance of a core of love I've rarely seen in my life.  God chose these final days for me to have my soul touched by Sr. Mary of the angels.

What is there in this for us?  I hear many who share that they listen and listen for a calling from God. They want Him to speak up, to annunciate stronger, to give clearer signs.  Is the problem with our call really on God's part? Of course not. He calls us day by day and moment by moment.  Maybe, just maybe, the answer is contained in Nelson Mandella's inaugural address. He said,

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are born to make manifest the glory of God within us.As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

Herein, lies my epiphany.  As I stood on the altar serving mass just behind the bust of my scripture hero, St. James, I begged one thing of God, to make me into a man like St. James. Jesus called James and his brother, John, "Men of Thunder."  My prayer, Nelson's inspiration, and Sr. Mary's inpiration have become a braid of new life's direction for me. 

How does this strike you?  Do Mandella's word ring a bell in you? Can a bit more 'thunder' be rattled from within you? Is there a new cord of sacrifice and deeper love for Jesus calling forth as it did in Sr. Mary?

Embrace a new call, feel His love churn with a new faith walk, and join me at the pool of Siloam.

We are His faithful souls ready to be "sent" to liberate others.

In confidence of his faith in new direction, the sunlight of hope for the path, and the passion to follow Him more dearly.

Deacon Willie, DW