22 September 2015
Azofra, just west of Najera
From “When” to “Then”
It’s a challenge of Wi-fi addicts on the Camino that there
are villages with anemic signals. Such has been the case these past two days
for me. I am still nursing a painful right knee and a brilliant red bulbous
blister on the right toe, “This little piggy went home.” Both have some
treatment and I’m managing. It was a first for me to leave Navarette before the
sunrise. It was difficult walking in predawn light, but encouraging because it
meant I was ahead of the hot afternoon sun.
Forgive the old school teacher coming out of me today. What I
share today is a long trail of personal reflection regarding two short lines in
scripture. It formed as a bit of a
scripture contemplation focused upon 2 Corinthians 12:9-10. “I willing boast of
my weaknesses that the power of Christ might be upon me. So I am content with
weakness, insults, persecutions, distress, hardships, and troubles for the sake
of Christ. For when I am weak it is then that I am strong.”
I began with a simple but difficult question. What are my
weaknesses? So many came to mind but I made sense out of it by filtering my
experiences through the 8 deadly sins. They are temptations born of being
human.
S Sloth,
how many times have I denied prayer time for my very important day’s schedule
L Lust, it
comes in many forms but it is also known as “Every man’s struggle.”
A Anger, the psychology of which is a
feeling come from loss. Loss of self-image, finances, prestige, power,
position, near danger, etc. How much
energy have I wasted by imagined loss vs. real loss?
P Pride. After all, it’s all about
me. Right? Related as an 8th temptation-False Pride. That is a
behavior represented in the gospel with the Pharisee’s comment in the temple, “Thank
God I am not like this sinner. I tithe, pray” etc. A pride disguised in a holy
outward appearance.
E Envy, the unhealthy desire to be,
look, have what another has.
G Greed, the sin of more and more and
more.
G Gluttony, the sin of never being
satisfied.
I learned the
acronym, SLAPEGG, as an easy way to remember all of them. The 8th one is attributed to St.
Theresa of Avilla, I believe. With a
full breath of time to filter my life experiences through these 8 spiritually deadly
human activities, I came to admit that they are present in my life. I came to
recall how easily I get sidetracked into these tendencies. Even wholesome pleasures can be exaggerated
into something outside of the right proportions. Yes, even favorite foods or
the treat that could bring about World Peace, a yummy bowl of ice cream, can be
taken to extremes. Any pleasure, gift,
or good gift can be exaggerated into an unholy over attraction. This I saw in myself today.
But could I take the leap St. Paul
suggests," I willingly ‘BOAST’ of my weaknesses. I/We boast of many good
fortunes in life, in our successes, in our accomplishments, in those close to
us who make us proud. But to boast of weaknesses? This does not come easily,
nor naturally. When weakness is admitted for the sake of Christ, the admittance
of it honors Him. Otherwise, these 8
temptations are merely “the way things are, the way they always will be, they
are the life-long plight of being human.”
Fighting them for
the sake of Christ, makes them a battleground for growing in Him, in growing in
His holiness, in falling more in love with Him. The battle is for the sake of
Christ, indeed.
Then I came to
the perplexing inspiration within the message: “So I am content with my weaknesses.”
Really? Content with weaknesses? This almost sounds Un American. Yet it is what
St. Paul is directing of us. Nothing is
more important than living in righteousness with a dependence of God’s love and
mercy throughout every moment of life.
These troubling deadly 8 will plague us throughout the day. And we may
fool ourselves as to believe that we are doomed to fall with each one. After
all, “I’m just human.” True, be we can be and should strive to grow in
holiness. Each temptation overcome brings a greater capacity for Christ’s
presence to grow within us.
Just when I was
putting this path to greater holiness in my thinking, the idea of a God bargain
enlightened my thinking. In the last
line of this particular scripture has two phrases. The first part reads, “It is
WHEN I am weak. So “when” am I weak? My examination of this within my life came
with the answer, “Always.” I am always weak. I am always vulnerable for falling
for these traps. The difference lies in me that I do not always admit my
weakness to them. I am weak only when I
admit to God and call out to Him that I am weak. Outside of that, I move
through my day confident, maybe over confident, in my independence.
And here is where
the bargain presented itself. The last phrase in this scripture line reads, “It
is ‘THEN’ that I am strong. Not God strong until I admit my weakness and
dependence. Not God strong until I call upon His strength throughout my day. It
is only then do I experience strength, His strength, living, loving, forgiving,
wisely guiding my life.
This is our opportunity:
To go from “WHEN” to “THEN.” To go from
humility to strength, human power to God power, from fear of being discovered
for who I am to the power of knowing “whose” I am. All for the ‘sake of Christ.’
I’ll take the
deal. How about you?
In His grip,
Deacon Willie, DW
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