Hidden Treasures

14 September 2015

Roncesvalles,Spain

Hidden treasures

I set out for the infamously most difficult climb of the Camino. It was the stretch from Orrisson, France to Roncesvalles, Spain.  It was a grueling 3000 foot climb over the Pyrenees Mts.  The trip to the summit was difficult made much more difficult by the weather. The temperatures dropped to 38 degrees with 30 mile an hour winds, and very cold rain and sleet. I witnessed two ladies in their mid 70’s who came down with hypothermia.  It was a startling and pitiful site. Emergency vehicles arrived to rescue them. I prayed for them all day.

All the trip up I was looking for the beauty that I experienced on my first Camino. There were panoramic views of the mountainside. I looked for the experience of seeing mountain sheep peacefully grazing and who would wander to the fence for a closer look.  And the monument of Mother Mary at the peak?!  It was not to be seen.  Not even the moment of great accomplishment when you stood at the sign separating France from Spain.  All of these treasures were buried in the thick fog and low cloud cover. In fact, the beauty of God’s glory and creation that I came to expect to see once again was unseeable. 

I knew His glory existed because I saw it once before.  I stood in awe at His creation two years ago.  I knew it was there. I stood in the very spot that I knew it existed.  I came to accept this experience as God’s hidden treasures.  Faith told me they were present, but my eyes could not see them. 

I did not waste time fretting over what did not happen or what expectations I lost.  I was blessed with a memory of faith that gave me as a comfort.  That is not always the pattern of my life journey.  How easy it is to get fixated on re experiencing a gift God has once given. All the same ritual and procedure was followed. There was sacrifice as a holy way to approach the same experience.  Others may have shared their routine toward receiving the grace which you followed ritually.  Every effort was done the same way as the past experience but the result seemed empty. 

So what happened?  It is said that God will purposely withdraw these wonderful experiences in order to help us learn to separate His gifts from the giver of gifts.   Our human condition can get fixated on these gifts. I’ve heard these gifts identified by many as “a holy experience, a touch of the Holy Spirit, a reverent cleansing, a divine joy, inexplicable peace, an overflowing of His love, a divine inspiration, and the list can go on and on.

Saints and inspired writings identify this empty experience as something necessary so that we truly can separate the gifts from the giver of gifts. This is so we grow in our devotion and love of Him, the Creator of all good things from His treasures.  As we continue on in faith many experience a weening period toward this more mature faith. Sadly, too many abandon the faith when the gifts are not ‘felt.’

I had this reminder today in the Pyrenees.  All of the costs, sacrifices, fervent prayer for this benefit on the most difficult stretch of the Camino was lost in the clouds. Literally.

Adding to this, the heavy rain and sleet ran downhill.  This made the final descent of 20 degrees grade over 3 km a kneeful pain. It also made it treacherous. I fell on a slippery rock covered in mud.  My elbow caught my fall in a delightful track of very mushy mud.  I was safe, praise God.

In reflection of the draining exertion, fatigue, and loss of “treasures” that marked my highlights on the Camino today, I took solace in the fact that God was watching every step I was taking. His treasures were hidden, but his love and protection is always present.

When prayers seem to bounce off the ceiling, when there seems to be nothing felt from prayers, when all the religious rituals don’t make sense, when it gets to the point when we want to shout out, “I don’t get anything out of this!”  Stay the course and walk on in faith. The giver of gifts has a storehouse of his unimaginably ‘perfect’ hidden treasures ideally prepared for YOU.

My inspiration was fueled all this day by my fervent prayers for Britany Lamson.  I wrote of her on 13 September as the young mother who was a victim of cancer.  Which is harder to endure? Rain, cold, mountain climbing, overwhelming fatigue or cancer?  People fast or accept self-sacrifice as prayer routine and love offering.

I offer my entire day for Britany, her soul in eternity, and her family.

Fondly,

Deacon Willie, DW